smile

 

If you're having a bad day.. =)

keep being positive of everything

When sadness strikes me, I feel I'm the unluckiest person in this world. I feel I'm cursed. Sometimes I feel I shouldn't be born. I never ask for it but when I'm here already, that means I've agreed with God  in before-life that I'm willing to go through life's challenges and obey Him. Which I don't remember going through at all. But alhamdulillah, thank God, I have never thought of suicide or harming myself because I have faith in God. I do. Even I don't remember of making a deal with Him. Alhamdulillah.

Hard times. They are always there. Always. If you're living life easy, that means, you're never living. But why, I get things pretty easy. My life's comfortable. I get to eat. I get to drink. I get some things I really want. To list down of everything I'm thankful of, it'd be a long story. Cut it short, why on earth I get sad when a little thing happens to me? Compare to other people who only get to eat food once a week... yes, that literally happens now in another part of the World. And the horrible thing that is currently happening in Egypt now. It's just too heartbreaking. May God protect those souls and give the country freedom, ameen. Always keep Egypt in our du'as, inshaAllah.

But, doesn't that mean I can't be sad when I'm in trouble or going through a hard time? No. I deserve to be sad. I deserve to cry. But to what extent? To the extent you keep reminding yourself it all happens of reasons and keep being positive, which is extremely hard.

I give you an example, maybe this would and could apply to you too.

You want to meet your friend who lives in Kuala Lumpur for the first time. You live in Rawang. You go there by car. But you don't know the way. You try googling the map, you get it. You jot it down or you memorize. (cuz you don't have a GPS that's why bro). But you still get lost. Let's say the friend lives somewhere in Sentul, KL. You really have no clue where's Sentul and from Rawang, there's no Sentul written on the signs. (orang baru first time drive ke KL la katakan).. Then you get really nuts finding ways. Then you call your friend which way you should take and she explains it. You get it. But because your sense of direction sucks, you still cannot find it. So you take a moment to take a break and find again the way to Sentul. Oh take this road and this road and bla bla bla. And then, you get it! Alhamdulillah! You learn the hard way.

I definitely am the person who learns things the hard way. I always make mistakes and then be sad again. But I keep thanking God for putting me into those situations I've gone thru. So many things, He has shown me. So many. Life's totally a struggle. Struggle for us to be positive of anything and everything. Life's not and NEVER a bed of roses.

Nevertheless, I know, it's really, really hard to keep being positive when something unpleasant happens in your life. It's just not easy. It takes time and effort to heal. Later, it builds you as a positive human being if you are THINKING and ACTING positive. Even people around you are being massive d-bags and spreading negativity(sorry but some people have black hearts). You keep going. That's for sure. Do not mention that you want to end this life, that shows your -10000% weakness.

It doesn't matter anymore you can't remember signing up for this life (as a human being). I can't too. But I promise, if I can choose my own life, I would choose to be a cat instead. My life as a cat would be lucky or unlucky, but at least, I won't get punished in the afterlife for all the troubles I've made or the sins I've committed.

Oh why, wow. Why am I being so serious.. I guess, I was too sad, but now, I'm totally fine. I'm so grateful to God for giving me this test. I learnt another thing. Alhamdulillah. I wouldn't learn if this didn't happen. God willing, insha Allah, I'll always keep in mind to be positive.

Be happy, always keep smiling. Positive. Surely, "God does not burden any human being with more than he is well able to bear" (Holy Quran: 2:286).

:) :)

x

thoughts & opinions

I'm genuinely concerned how horrible I am being a person. I keep making promises to myself but I never really succeed realising it. Like when I (once upon a time) said that I wanted to publicize my photography website (it's there but it's not legit yet) and write more on my writing blog, I'd never do. I have a lot of plans and ideas that I can apply on my photography and also writing. But as I mentioned above, I fail in realising any of it. I do feel horrible.

And now, here I am with another idea that probably I'm the one and only loyal reader of my blog or Malaysians would say, "syok-sendiri". Which is, unfortunately true. I cannot recall when was the last time I ever received a comment, a real comment, not spam. Haha! But anyway, the idea is, I'm gonna write my thoughts and opinions about anything on this blog. Maybe my view about the current news or my thoughts on the Miley Cyrus' twerking trend or something nerdy like book suggestions and stuff reviews. You never know. It'll be about anything, anything I would like to talk about. I will still update this blog even no one reads it. Yes.

Sometime ago, when I looked back what I've written in the past, I felt like shooting myself with a gun. Total embarrassment. What the hell did I think back then?! How lame, uncool, silly I was. I probably will go back and delete some of the posts but I bet you're gonna dig those gold and laugh at my stupid crap I produced back then before I do it. Go on. I was 14, 15 that time. My language skills and grammar were extremely terrible. My thinking was definitely not yet opened and I never wanted to go out of my comfort zone. But I learnt a lot for the past years.

About the header. Oh, I'm still working on it. I actually did it but it turned out as a silly and ugly header so I'm currently doing it again. But that has to wait, I have a lot of assignments to be done by next week. And I've done any.

Tomorrow also will be the last day of School Based Experience for this semester. There's no word can express how jolly is that to me. I wonder, why did I even sign up for this. Work overload.

Anyway, I'll write more. If you're willing to read my rubbish. My Lord. Why am I ranting here instead of doing my assignment?

Cuz, yolo.

the catcher

My 'workstation', yes I prefer to be in the dark, such a loser I am. And clearly, the wall needs to be repainted but since we are moving house by next year, I pause to that.

I've been reading "The Catcher in The Rye" for a week already.. It's not that I don't have time, but I nowadays enjoy reading slowly so I can really get the plot rather than rushing to finishing a book. Maybe another reason is that I sleep 24/7 this hari raya holidays, really though. 

I have tons of assignments which I should have started but I haven't, at all. I just read the questions and felt like, what the heck I should do, I don't even know what I learnt in school. Haha! I'm supposed to finish at least one or two, but none. Being lazy at its finest. I'm such a terrible person, and I know it. 

I hate that the title of this post has to be so, so uncreative, ah blame all unproductiveness at home. 

Anyway, I purchased a new 50mm 1.4 lens recently, it's a Sigma, and I'm loving it so much! It's a waste I'm locking myself in the house. But so far, the images I've taken with it are up to my satisfaction. This time, I'm trying to take care of it and inshaAllah, make a full use of it! :)

About my photoblog (this blog used to be, and maybe, will always be, but this will be my secondary blog if the 'official' one is done), I know I said I was gonna buy a domain, but still, haven't because I'm simply a terrible, lazy person. Hahaha, but seriously, it's gonna be on before September, that's what I'm gonna try my best. I'm currently searching for a web-designer who can make my photoblog beautiful, simple and neat. I've a friend who is able to do it, but I still want to survey. If any of you happens to read this and know a friend or acquaintance, please let me know! (preferably; Malaysian)

have a good hari raya and well, happy working and welcome back to school! :)

x

Selamat Hari Raya!

29th Ramadan

Finally Ramadan is coming to its end. It's like a blink of eye, really! But for the past one week since holidays started I've been so unproductive by sleeping 24/7 lol 'cause I'm a failure in life idek??!

I know, those pictures aren't related to Ramadan but well.. it's mah blog (the second picture - my food for iftar but it's a long story I'm not gonna type it out hahah)

I'm pretty excited for hari raya but somehow I'm not gonna go out much since there's a pile of assignments that needs to be done.

see you on hari raya, 'cause I love interweb so, so much! (annoying fangurl's voice) :P

:)

50%

Time flies so fast that I refuse to believe that I have gone through 50% of the fasting month, Ramadan. It seems like a normal month to me - still a busy month, loads of work & less time to play around.

But cheer up, there's still space and time to maximise our ibadah / Quran recitation before the month ends.

Stay strong, stay humble!

(maybe not so serious post next... )

:)

True meaning?

Ramadan Kareem

Probably the most unoriginal decoration on khat calligraphy ever. It's one of the first images that would come out on google results if you type "ramadan kareem greetings". but give me a clap for succeeding copying it? lol. I really have had no idea to do the decoration for it. It was quite a busy day for me (and week... month.. actually!) The calligraphy was done with only a pencil that I carved because I don't have a calligraphy pen. And for the record, it's my first time writing arabic/jawi calligraphy in years, maybe 3 years so I'd consider my skill hasn't completely vanished lol.

***

Alhamdulillah, Ramadan has finally come again! The most awaiting month for me, personally. I just love the environment of fasting in Ramadan. Most of the days, I wouldn't even feel hungry, if I do that day, I must have loads of work. My non-Muslim friends respect me and they try to avoid eating in front of me, and some of them even try fasting which I think is absolutely amazing! They do not know the meaning of Ramadan and why we Muslims have to fast for the whole month. Of course, this scene only can be seen in Malaysia or other majority-Muslim countries. If you're a Muslim (a new or from born) in 4-season countries, I hope you're strong enough to cope fasting for more than 20 hours because it's summer now. Allah surely will help you, dear brothers and sisters! My prayers will always be with you! *hugs*

A thing I just came across on tumblr;

It makes me sad when I read this... :(

There's indeed a community of Muslims who only practices Islam whenever/wherever they want, but again, who are we to judge them?  It's their personal choice, we can't force them to practice, or can we? They still count themselves as Muslims, that's good enough. Who knows, along the way while trying to practicing Islam, they'll like the way of life in Islam?

Does it make us more Muslims than them by labeling them as "Ramadan Muslims"?
No.

Does that help them from staying to practice Islam?
If they're positive yes, if they're negative, no.

Does that make us pray to God more?
Personally, my answer would be no. But if yours is yes, well, I need to learn from you. *smirks*

Remember, Ramadan's is all about gratitude, humbleness and patience. It's a month where you can eliminate your bad habit (like smoking). And avoid vain talks and of course, always be patient. After all, it's how you see your relationship with God, that matters the most. It's a month of change! It's a month of starting good habits and breaking bad habits! inshaAllah, you can do it! we can do it!

Happy fasting and keep strong! :)

xoxo